Ok. It’s going to be a bit long.
Well, back in the day, with a desire/goal in mind and no knowledge of magick or occult stuff (because where I am back then in 2000 there were to grimoires for sale around me, this and other forums hadn’t even been thought of yet back then I had nothing to guide me and direct me on how to).
So I did the dumb shit. I took ideas from books and horror movies, and created my own attempt at making a pact.
I tried to make a pact sell my soul for you might be able to guess… for … rock and roll (so cliche’ right?).
Well I was half successful something came. I’ve since concluded it was a parasite or other low vibration entity.
I couldn’t see or hear spirits, I didn’t know what was supposed to happen I
I’ll say this, it stunk up the house bad for a week after. Maybe I should have taken the smell as a warning that something wasn’t right but I didn’t.
Might also have been good to pay attention to the fact that for a month after it came I could feel the smoke in me and smell it.
Though I couldn’t see or hear spirits I could feel it.
It started off gently enough. I’d feel a touch a caress. Then at some point it started possessing me. Still couldn’t see or hear spirits (not that I could have seen it in me, I’d have to be supermen with X-ray vision to see inside me).
Still felt it communicate that it didn’t mean harm by its caresses. Don’t take that to mean it doesn’t. In my possession that was just o ploy a trick it was not benign.
There was only 1 thing I got from it being in me and it wasn’t rock and roll. It was the ability to understand languages I’d never learned (even write and communicate in them. I’ll tell you that was no perk with what happened next.
I almost died after it had entrenched itself . It stopped being nice and bombarded me with negative emotions til I tried suicide. It wanted me dead and almost had its way. Entrenched is the right word for it it had progressed so far it was nearing a state of perfect possession nearing it. It hadn’t hit the final stage of merge but it was a hairs breadth away from it. I was feeling it’s feelings and thought and it mine (you can’t imagine how intimate that was if you’ve never experienced it (I recommend that you DON’T try).
You know they say you have times you lose time and can’t account for what happened well it’s true (definitely true when a negative entity is possessing you.
Then it became the enemy within bombed me with so much despair depression messed & it and that spirit influenced depression messed with my outer life had the boss threatening to fire me and me in danger of homelessness.
Once at work it shoved me under (into a dark place) and when it did whatever and let me surface there was a crazy lady screaming at me that I was evil. It was like I was like WTF.
About a week before it was removed from me you know in moving es how Dracula gets burnt by the Eucharist (holy blessed bread) well I felt the Eucharist feet like it was burning my mouth when I took it.
About a week after it had managed to make me try suicide I was at church (fam is Catholic) and I was walking to? From? Communion (forget which) and I felt it being pulled out of me like a cork being pulled from a bottle a suction then like the cork popping out it was gone. Something pulled it out of me. That was like a week after the Eucharist thing and after I’d tried to you know.
I attribute it being pulled out to having something to do with how I had worded the pact (basically I had said I had to keep control and if I didn’t want to do something it wouldn’t force me (ya right. Obviously it didn’t follow those conditions). So something intervened and pulled it out of me.
If it hadn’t been pulled out… well I was in to deep to help my self out I’d have probably ended up dead.
Oh and after it was out there was an instant change in me mood and more.
So that was my bad negative experience with A (one) spirit (it made me magick shy for years after for fear it could happen again).
Basically I had enough desire that my slapped together Hollywood inspired effort to part/sell my soul managed to attract a negative entity or parasite which then proceeded to trick me into thinking it was not a neg and to let it possess me so it could help me become a rock star though I was so nieve uneducated occult wise it didn’t have to work too hard to trick me I was willingly going along until it went sideways and it revealed it wasn’t what I wanted when it tried to drive me suicide and make me dead.
So lesson learnt the hard way.
Don’t use Hollywood horror movies and teen type occult horror books as inspiration for a ritual and Don’t try pacting or selling your soul to something when you don’t have any opened occult senses and don’t know what came to answer you.
In short, I learned it’s not smart to try a part/contract type magick if you don’t have the ability to see or hear spirits er verify that the one that comes in the real one not a pretender.
Oh and now that occult knowledge is available I also take this to heart learn to banish and be more careful more wary and don’t try dealing with a spirit if you haven’t the ability to discern if the spirit that comes is the one you intend to deal with.
Now there’s my BAD experience with a spirit. Hope that anyone who reads it can avoid my mistakes because they were doozies and almost ended me.
I’ve told this elsewhere but it’s the first time I’m telling it in detail here (so if it’s familiar you might have read it before elsewhere).
Add and if anyone read that and didn’t figure this out: It didn’t work. I’m NOT a rock star. All I got out of it was a life experience. So not worth going through all that.Also the language ability went bye bye with the spirit.