30AUG
I was pulled into ritual by Abaddon. I can feel Belial and Legion near. Shadow Kid, too.
A: “If you can hear us, why do you continue to do prep work?”
M: “To deepen the experience. Maybe it will help with additional understanding. Are you asking me to stop?”
A: “No.” (I continued)
B: “That’s probably good enough. We’re not trying to manifest (fully) here.”
L: “The Shadow Kid”
M: “The Shadow kid…?”
L: “Use him.”
M: “I didn’t think he was safe to direct. Does he not have a tendency to bite the hand that directs him?”
L: “He does. Are you not capable of defending yourself?”
M: “Should I have to?”
L: “The most dangerous toys pose a risk to their ‘owner’. So do the most effective.”
M: “Are you speaking to me? I don’t own him.”
L: “Don’t you? While in this space?”
M: “There’s less of a need for directing him inside spaces I own or control.”
L: “Are you sure? Do you know him that well?”
M: “Well, we do go bac a few days now. (Legion was actually irritated by this point). Why are you irritated?”
L: “You’re missing the point.” (Nothing was said for a while, while I waited)
Abaddon carved out a space in my ritual area and the Shadow Kid was in it. “Command him.”
(I took control of the area and began to command him.)
A: “(Abaddon took it back) No.”
(2022 - this wasn’t about a sovereignty debate or argument and I knew that was very secondary. This was simply the most efficient way to demonstrate the lesson)
M: “This is about control over more than just the area I claim.”
A: “It is. Now, do it.”
(I knew that simply giving the order, even authoritatively, wasn’t going to be enough. I thought for a moment and remembered that I’ve been swapping energy with the Shadow Woman. This led to me realizing that this wasn’t some foreign energy after all, even if it was a psychological barrier)
(I connected with that same energy in him and commanded him towards a target. He went immediately and without drama)
B: “Well done. It took longer than it should have.”
A: “(Abaddon relinquished the space) Use that control when dealing with them from now on.”
M: “Will that impact my ability to learn from them? If I take control whenever they’re in my area, how will I learn anything?”
A: “Take control, but don’t task (if you don’t want to). We will tell you when to stop this. (I felt this would be more of a rare occurrence than a set period of time). That is all I have for you right now.” He left.
B “Why do you think the dream happened?”
M: “I’m a little unsure. Part of me thinks it was because I called upon Azazel to get additional information (for a friend).”
B: “Why didn’t you call on us?”
M: “I felt I’d been given what I was going to be given.”
B: “Why did you discuss it with her (my friend)?”
M: “Something told me I should. I resisted it for a while, but it grew until I listened.”
B: “And did that make you feel better?”
M: “I’m unsure at this point. I found it insightful and she raised a lot of good points.”
B: “You were right to do that. We figured you’d do better talking to a peer than listening to those who gave you the news.”
M: “You made it seem as if you disapproved, at first.”
B: “You needed a lesson in confiding to your peers.”
M: “Was all that just a lesson for that?”
B: “No, it will come to pass.”
M: “And the dream?”
B: “It will come to pass. Part of this is about (lessons for others in the dream). No (just ) you.”
Belial left after this. Legion remained.
L: “You commanded well. You’ve been feeding the stone (I nodded). He doesn’t care about that (the regular feeding of the stone). He cares about misery, suffering, and making others hurt. You’re not going to be able to feed that into the stone (easily). You’ve largely dealt with that (those experiences, personally, and a reminder it’s still partly there).” He left after this reminder.