So… A bit of background info before I get down to brass tacks.
I met this guy online like 12 months ago, we shall call him Mercedes for the post to protect his privacy. I’m sure he’d LOVE to know I’ve been writing about him in a magick Journal lmao. Mercedes and I have been chatting on and off, by we had never met. He also has a habit of just vanishing on me for extended periods.
Normally this doesn’t bother me as I’m somewhat flighty too. But if someone sorta disappears mid conversation (especially after showing me a pic of them with a black eye), I gt a bit worried when I don’t hear from them for a week plus. I’m a little paranoid about it as the last time that happened, I ended up at the person’s funeral. Anyhow, Mercedes disappears for like 2 weeks, pretty much mid convo.
Now, he disappearing part isn’t the weird part… Weirdest part I mean. The man and whole thing is weird, but I digress… The weirdest part is that, upon hearing that I was in a tight spot financially, gave me money, arranged to come over, ghosted, messaged me the next day THEN disappeared.
About two/three weeks later, he messages me. While I was happier than I expected to be hearing from him, I did tell him " you got some 'splaining to do, Houdini". He was contrite, and we chatted away as we normally would. Don’t hear from him for a few days, but ended up hearing from him randomly yesterday when I wasn’t far from where he lives. So we teed up to finally meet.
Now I get to my point… I mean nothing went wrong yesterday; although weird, he was an absolute gentleman and even drove me to pick up my son and dropped us at my apartment. The conversation was good, he wasnt weird in a creepy, handsy “this dude is a potential r*pist” way, and it was chill. My problem is I have terrible taste in people lol.
In saying that though, this ties in perfectly with a reading I had done and a few other things. So I’m confused. Is this shit falling into place? Or have I picked another wrongun? Only time and tarot cards will tell. Haven’t done a reading about this one, which is odd. But I am curious as to his intentions.
I also don’t know how he’d react to seeing my altar and stuff in the living room. He’s not exactly a magick type from what I can gather. I don’t want to hide it because that’s a BIG part of who I am, but I also want to hide it because well, there’s blood and stuff lol. I mean, it’s my goddamn house. I can have what I want, where I want within reason. But I know how some people are.
In saying that though, it would be a good test to see if he’s going to be like the last guy I invited into my life and be disrespectful (said my main man King Belial “ain’t shit” and referred to my practice as "those demons you play with… I think I know why Belial HATES him lol), or freak out and run away never to be sent again, try to tell me how “mAgIcK iSn’T rEaL” or be totally ok. Like I can get making a couple of wise cracks, like my friend who, when J first started just leaving my stuff out asked me if I sacrifice goats. I can handle that and being told it’s not real or even runnig away. I mean if I was a muggle still and I saw a windowsill and glass tables with bloodied sigils, tarot cards, candles, incense and the odd spatter of blood I miss occasionally, I’d probably have a wtf moment too.
But disrespect is not called for. I don’t go around asking Catholics what Jesus’s blood tastes like or Muslims whether music is Haram because they can’t dance or whatnot. I think, while all beliefs should be scrutinised occasionally to see if they still hold worth, that disrespecting someone’s beliefs in their own fucking house is just a bit shit. I, stupidly, let that wankpuffin slide that night. Going so far as placating Belial to get him to leave the guy alone. Turns out old mate was right (and they may have had personal issues in the past) and he enjoyed pointing that out immensely lol. If anyone has ever sat through Belial saying “I told you so” you know what I mean
But yes… I’m going to pull some cards later. I’m curious about multiple points about this. I’m also thinking of maybe doing a lust ritual with Prince Sitri in the next few days to kinda amp things up a little. Tbh, I don’t really think I see this going too much farther into serious territory. Dude is too flighty. … BUT it’s also most likely what Orobas mentioned in a reading done for me a couple months ago. This dude fits the person mentioned in that reading to a t. And I trust Orobas’ word. He’s not steered me wrong so far.
Also, tonight if I don’t fall asleep too early, I’m going to try and chat to Long Belial about, amongst other things, our pact and possibly doing qlippoth soon. I’ve walked too far into the shadows now according to Moloch; time to dive into the bottomless abyss and commit.