Ok… Figured I’d start a journal here. Happy for constructive criticism and encouragement alike.
So I’ve buckled down and really started focusing on my practice and figured I should keep track of things here. A few of you may know me in passing already, but for the rest of you, this will provide a window into the world of someone who’s figuring shit out as she goes
To start the journal, I shan’t be too intense, I’ll just share a pic from my most recent hex rite of Abaddon (Hail Apollyon the destroyer!)… Can you see the interesting part of the pic?
But yes… This is a recent working of VK Jehanaum’s Hex Rite of Abaddon.
Abaddon has a warped sense of humour and decided to speak to me in French when I do not speak a word of French. Apparently, this is because I was addressing him wrongly. Whether it’s because he thought my sheer confusion at speaking told off in French was funny or because he was teaching me a lesson about being correct when speaking to someone, I’m not sure.
If you look at the light above the candle, I think you can see a face. Can you?
Tomorrow, I shall include some musings with Belial as tomorrow is usually our hangout day. Tonight, I finish with Abaddon for a few days. Tuesday, I start some tarot practice.
I also really have to get better with my spiritual hygiene… I’m TERRIBLE at being good with it.
Last night’s workings. Pic one is some offerings to Abaddon and Belial.
Second pic is the beginning of the hex rite of Abaddon. I should’ve paired it with the eyes of calamity and multiplicity, but I got distracted.
Had an uninvited guest in my little space and they weren’t pleasant. Turned into a mental sparring match and ended with me getting them out through sheet force of will. Man, they were effing strong. I have felt drained all day today. But I won. Have a feeling it was sent my way because of someone I know and their sheer negativity (whether intentional, idk) toward me because their attack felt very directed. And I can usually easily get rid of spirits that I haven’t invited… This was different.
Anyhow, tonight, I’ll be banishing the whole area with my special exorcism salt (it’s really just Himalayan Rock salt, mixed with hot peppers and other cleaning herbs And doing an LBRP.
Also, Belial is somewhat cranky with me ATM. I think it’s more in a shitstirrer kind of way because he hadn’t been overly angry about it.
He’d been requesting a gold pillar candle for a while and I eventually got one that was quite pretty. Unfortunately, said candle didn’t burn very well and is quite poor quality.
Anyone who’s had a working relationship with Belial knows he isn’t backwards in being forward. I’ve of the reasons I enjoy his company is because he’s so blunt. But, yes; he has become annoyed at the candle and I was gruffly told that I “cheaped out on that piece of shit candle” and was told to get him a new one ASAP and to never burn the other again.
I’ll call him Abaddon in this thread for expediency (he wants me to refer to him as Apollyon the destroyer in our workings. That’s actually a funny story too…) despite arrangements we have. Abaddon was unhappy with my incense choice and has demanded I buy him copal incense as this current smells “bad”
We also had a funny interaction between Abaddon and Belial; I was burning frankincense for bridal while giving offerings to Abaddon and Abaddon didn’t like the frankincense, Belial of course found this hilarious.
I’ve realised some of you may wonder why you will see that little moonstone skull in a lot of my pics, so allow me to answer a question that hasn’t yet been asked…
The skull seems to be a good little focus point for me during meditations and invocation. No spirit has complained or asked me to move it as yet, so it basically always sits in front of any candles on that small table in my altar setup.
Tonight, I’ve left some offering for the great prince Orobas… Couple of reasons. First was because I’m thinking of getting a new tarot deck and the second and probably bigger reason is because his sigil kept popping up in my living room today. I have a collection of hand drawn sigil I use during invocation/meditation/evocation workings and Orobas’ kept just appearing, so I figured he wants something.
So a simple offering of some alcoholic ginger beer, some red sandalwood and a candle. Nothing fancy as this is an informal meeting and I’ll be asking him what he specifically wants in return for his help. Haven’t spoken with Orobas for a while, so it’s high time to methinks.
Will update later… Please enjoy a pic of my simple offering this evening.
This is slightly clearer and you can see some cool patterns in the incense smoke.
Now, I have to be honest and say I’m still pretty new at this and I’m asking a lot of it up as I go so please don’t take anything I write here as a way of doing things. I’ve found methods that work for me and I’m happy to share some of them to a point, but I am far from an adept and not one to be teaching anyone.
That said, let me share something that works really well for me when doing an invocation… Again, this is a method that works for ME. It very well may not work for you at all, but if it does, please let me know so it can inflate my ego?
Anyhow, this is a super simple invocation method. You will need a bathtub, comfortably full of water and that’s really it. You can add the favoured incense of the spirit your invoking and some candles, but they aren’t necessary (VERY helpful though. Even if you have them in your altar space while you’re in the bath). Lay down in the water and allow yourself to really feel the water around you. Close your eyes and focus on the sensation of the water around you and clear out your mind of everything but the feeling of the water. Slowly bring your focus around to the entity you’re invoking and begin either chanting or saying their enn in your head. If you’re able to visualise (I can’t due to aphantasia) their sigil and keep focused on noticing the change in energy around you.
After a few minutes, you should feel a change. I don’t know how to describe it exactly, but you will almost feel a charge in the water around you as you as the spirit you’re calling makes their presence known. You can then proceed as you would with any other invocation, like by asking for signs or attempting to communicate. This will require some degree of clairaudience. This method I believe works as water is both a spiritual shield and conductor. The bath acts as both a protective circle and like a signal booster. However, that’s just my theory as to why it works as I’ve had great successes this way. Hopefully, this helps a few of you fine folks who may be struggling with crossing that bridge and making contact.
Have been AWOL for a bit processing some personal stuff, but I’m back to my diary and back to my practice.
As per Belial’s recent request, I’ve replaced his candles with yellow votive candles as they are better than the “piece of shit” gold candle he had and I’m talking about him publicly.
He’s been very much active in my life, leading me down a path of hedonism for a bit. It’s made me laugh at reading some entries on forums such as Reddit and seeing how different my experiences with him are compared to others. He’s been an excellent teacher, but I’ve not gotten the “kind and caring” vibe I keep reading about. Like he has been pushing me to be more confident, but he’s also a damn deviant lol. I’m getting a side that I don’t often read about.
Tonight will be a nice, little offering for him for the behind the scenes work. I also have some research to do as during a session, I was told to look up a ritual with Belial as we haven’t actually done one together. He was specific in what he asked for (something about a rite of destruction) but I’m yet to find it online. Once I find it, I may combine it with the rites of multiplicity and calamity by VK Jehenaum (however it’s spelt) for extra oomph.
I would also like to give some shout outs to my other “friends” Apollyon/Abaddon and Dantalion. Dantalion, you helped keep my head together when everything was falling apart. You didn’t make the situation better, that would’ve been impossible, but you helped me separate feeling from fact and I really appreciate it. Apollyon the destroyer; you work with the quickness and I thank you for your directness. I haven’t forgotten your gift, and you will receive it soon
I won’t be able to include photos until I get a new phone. Image quality on this piece of crap is terrible.
Had a catch up with Belial last night. Aside from him being quite greedy with the blood offering, it was quite a chilled catch up. Nothing much to report. I need to work on myself quite a bit. I’m not harsh enough and spend too much time considering others. Slowly, I’m learning that it’s okay to be selfish sometimes. But I’m also conflicted because I feel selfish for things I already do, so I have to work on not overthinking things. Which, when you have anxiety is not fucking easy lol. But I’ve made more progress in the last few months than I did in years trying to do “the right thing”.
The plan is to get myself up to scratch with my skills and clairs etc, and then do my qlippoth initiation. I’m not ready yet and I know I have a lot of work to do, so the timeframe is tenuously set to do it in 6months. I’ll finally pick two patrons, get my ritual work en pointe and progress to the goal of qlippoth initiation. If anyone has any tips that they can offer for ways to get ready for it, I’d appreciate it.
Today, I’ll be spending time with my homie Abaddon/Apollyon and getting ready. I still have to find that ritual Belial was talking about, but I’m lost. I should’ve asked if he meant I was to write it or not. Oh well…
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