@ReyCuervo “Skeletons in the Closet”
For a reminder on the tarot spread and things to think about for the cards, check out…
SKULL: Trapped Thoughts
10 of Wands Reversed.
A secret you keep, something that bounces around in your head is a question of worth, of what you must do to keep things running and what you do for yourself, but especially others around you. While you may feel a burden is yours to bear, that doesn’t automatically determine whether you should bear it, or let it fall onto the shoulders of another.
You keep a secret of the things you have held onto for other people, and have done for yourself. There is no end in sight for this secret. The cycle can only come to a close when you are honest about the weight you have been given to bear; and come clean about why you bear it, and why you do not. (I feel there are separate circumstances warranting this clarification, that somethings you choose to hold onto to and work at/for/with, and somethings you choose to let go of and pass off.)
RIB CAGE: Hidden Feelings
Temperance.
You keep hidden feelings of balance. Whether it is because you are at times extremely unbalanced, or sometimes seemingly too balanced is irrelevant. This card shows that you hide your true nature of balance, that you want to show a certain feeling (perhaps of control, perhaps of desperation) to others even when you are feeling the opposite. You do not give others a chance to really see the truth, instead you alter their view of your “balance” to hide its true state.
You hide feeling of balance as something has been learned for a long time. Consider first acknowledging the truth to yourself of your balance (energetic, emotional, etc.) before seeking to disclose it to others. Take a moment when intense situations occur to make sure you are not also hiding feelings from yourself.
BACKBONE: Secrets that Hold You Up
Page of Wands.
There is a secret about the truth of your fun, enjoyable nature. Of your spirit of seeking out more and chasing after truths, changing tides, and the constant heat of the desert. No matter what it is you are looking for or trying to understand, the root of this sense of adventure and desire for fun has a past you do not like looking into (too deeply).
You want to knowledge, for newness is not something that can be easily separated from the rest of you. But, it still holds quite a bit of darkness and shadow in it. You are challenged to ponder why you seek adventure (in whatever way that means for you) and consider the dark roots underneath.
LEFT ARM: What You Wish You Could Tell
The Devil Reversed.
That you are not nearly so scary as you sometimes appear, that despite past actions you have become someone lighter, less chained to people/places/things. You wish you could tell others of the walk you have taken to be free of “The Devil,” to unchain yourself, to stop setting yourself and those around you on fire. You wish you could tell that your path is not always about the reversal of nature, of life, of the crow’s darkness; but that it is yours and reflects more than addiction, than black hatred, than naked bodies imprisoned by a satyr.
You wish you could tell people it is not evil. You wish they would listen. Because you know, even those who claim not to judge still do and even those who are hypocrites see you as somehow blacker, darker, more corrupted than they.
RIGHT ARM: What You Wish Could Never Be Known
The Fool Reversed.
This is 2 sided. For one portion of things the first paragraph and for the second portion, the second one.
That so many of your choices have been intentional, have been made with your eyes both open, have been made well thought-out. You wish others could never know that you are not and have never been a Fool in some respects. I believe these are choices you feel judged, or left out to hang for.
The second side is that you do not want others to know how much a “fool” you have felt at times. This does not have to be about things that (many) people know, this is probably about things you keep pretty quiet. You don’t want others to know about what/who you were before you began “walking away.” (I’m not sure what that last phrase means entirely, hopefully it means something to you.)
LEFT LEG: What You’ve Buried
10 of Swords, The Hierophant.
So, I couldn’t just read that card (10 Swords) as it stands. I pulled another, The Hierophant.
Either you’ve literally buried a “priest” before or this is talking about the relationship between burying a previous faith and burying yourself in a “new” “faith”/spirituality/path. The cards mean that you fell hard when this happened, that you felt or came close to death, that you had either “stabbed” yourself or been “stabbed” by others. You have buried those events of the past, but they still come up sometimes or show up in the things you do and don’t do.
Consider why this had to happen, why you don’t want to look at this event. Consider why this has an impact on now. This is something hard to look at and face, something from the past or perhaps seemingly another life, but the betrayal, the burial, the grief, the leaving this thing behind is not helping you anymore. It’s keeping chains around you.
RIGHT LEG: What Others Have Buried
Ace of Wands.
This is people trying to sabotage you. This is people trying to bury your opportunities, your past, your future. This is about people who you know (well) trying to keep you from advancing, progressing, having the new shiny things that you want.
This needs to be handled.