Being on the Other Side of Magick
Once upon a time, I was really close with a certain human. At the very beginningāas happens in most of my longer lasting personal relationships with peopleāI mentioned practicing magick. He was totally fine with it. Absolutely fine with it. Until, abruptly: āMagick is evil, the devil is evil, my gods are mean, and Iām mean for practicing magick.ā I walked away from magick for about a month.
Recently, Iāve been in communication with this human again. This human thinks his āGodā is the best thing ever. And honestly, Iām not sure what he does but itās like he does magick with YHWH. He asks for things, and puts energy toward them, and they fucking happen. Itās like what I do, but with that god. So we would clash sometimes, but we settled that I handle things with my gods and he handles things with his.
Hereās the part I wanted to get though. He got into a situation and told me to keep my āfriendsā (I offered to send him a ādemonā) away. He likes his god and his god is the best and theyāre friends and blah, blah blah. Iām over it because Iām not sure what he does but itās a close thing to what I call practicing magick. I let him go off and agree to keep my ādemonsā away.
It came up that his god had recently given him something he wanted. Me & My Attention. Heād been planning something for a while and heād been asking his god for a while for āmeā when it came time for the thing. This is a human I hadnāt spoken to in about half a year. I reached out because a mutual contact was worried and he and I used to be close.
Itās pretty unnerving to be on the other side of someoneās craft. To be the one drawn into things and not the one weaving things into being.
This isnāt, Iāve realized, even the first time with this human. There is something else which can also be traced to magick, to a woman of magick background/descent. Iām not going into details on what heās told me of his encounters with her or the words they shared about me, but there were quite a few.
Whatās interesting is about two months before I was reacquainted with this human (Iād known him a while and then he disappeared for some years and then he popped back up and then after three years we stopped talking for a while), I started having visions of him. I donāt mean Iād be thinking of him and see him. I mean, Iād be in the parking lot talking with my dad in the car and Iād suddenly not be able to see or hear anything around me, Iād be in a black room with a (this) human and heād wrap an arm over my midsection and one over my eyes. A few moments would go by and the vision would clear.
Iām not sure if that was an affect of whatever his & this womanās ā(not-)magickā were, or the magick itself now. But Iāve realized, someone was playing dirty. I had that same vision multiple times a week for about two months, they stopped when I met up with him again.
I recognized that it was him when I was having them. Heās a person Iād been close to before he disappeared. Iād know that energy anywhere. I thought maybe I was missing him? I thought maybe he was missing me? I thought maybe it was a fun premonition and Iād see him soon. I did not consider it was magick done by another party or related to it.
Hindsight really does reveal so much. The āvisionsā (probably a warning actually, and not a fun divination party trick) were about 4 years ago. The conversation where he told me his god had given him what he wantedāme, basicallyāwas last week.
I think itās cool I was alerted to the magick going on, Iām annoyed I took it as something pretty and good when Iām not sure it was. Oh the way that feelings and wishes cloud senses and reason. Who knows? Maybe it wasnāt magick but just things settling into place, but knowing he was talking about me with that woman, I canāt imagine magick had no role. And the other part on me reaching out, whatever. Itās just weird and creepy to know you are the manifestation.
So I just wanted to post on being on the other side of magick that isnāt inherently baneful. And throw in some ānot all magick is LHPā. Iāve been on the otherside of baneful too, 'twas scary and do not recommend.
Edits:
First I changed around a sentence.
Second, I want to note that Iām on semi-friendly terms with this person currently and respect (most of) his views if not his actions.