Notes, recipes, and memes

Full moon was kinda productive
Participated in a group invocation of Lucifer for my Quimbanda class. I probably won’t continue the classes after this month since I’m not really learning anything new. Waste of money mostly :woman_shrugging:t2: The teacher is nice most of the time, but it’s not worth what it costs. And a little too much emphasis on animal sacrifice. Like killing something is supposed to make the difference between a failed ritual vs a successful one​:roll_eyes: what am I even paying for…
I also did a ritual to improve my memory and intelligence to make school less of a burden. Weirdly I’m starting to like physics over chemistry.
I also have a minor neighbor issue- this woman (let’s call her Mrs P for poo) downstairs rams her broom into her ceiling whenever I walk around at night or even when my 8 lb cat decides to play with her toys. I hear my upstairs neighbor walking around too but im not going to make a big deal out of it. It’s just the reality of living in an old building in NYC with other people in the building. At this point, I’m tiptoeing in socks to minimize noise but still get the broom treatment so I did a binding spell and hid the poppet I made for it under her window which I can easily access via the fire escape. That’s what she gets for using a broom instead of words and sentences to communicate.
Yesterday I had a weird dream about being choked by what felt like unbreakable dental floss. It was like a very thin cord (like floss) was wrapped around my neck but I was fine and still breathing. I couldn’t wake up though and I tried. I read somewhere that this particular kind of nightmare (suffocating) could be a sign of feeling suffocated by too much work, which sounds about right.

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Fuck. Now I want to take the St. Cyprian course. Can’t afford to do both though.

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Wow thank you! It sounds like the kind of class I’d love to take. In the long run, t’s actually more affordable than my current “Quimbanda” class. I don’t have the time and money to travel to Brazil for an “initiation” which is all at an additional cost. Definitely not continuing the current class. That’s money I’d rather spend on one of Jason’s classes

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If you end up taking the St. Cyprian course, please let me know how you find it! I was really put off at first, because christianity, but honestly the more I read about paganism and folk magick, the more I realize how inseparable the bulk of (what we have left of) it is from christianity. And why spend so much energy resenting a religion, when it can be exploited for sorcery without really adopting any of its worldviews? I’ve been trying to find a way to work with Goetia from a non-JCI framework, by telling myself that they predate and transcend christianity- and they do, but maybe I would have more success if I just used the system as a tool. I have problems with Daoist and Buddhist theology, but that never stopped me from engaging with them magickally. Idk.

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For sure (to everything) l read somewhere that magicians don’t see branches of religion/labels, only power. When we disregard the labels, or like regard them less, there’s more power to access.

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Smokeless smudge/ Banishing and Cleansing Spray:

Angelica

Black Cohosh

Witch Hazel

Marjoram

Thyme

Sage

Lemon

Moon water

Optional: piece of quartz/quartz point

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Made for Lucifuge Rofocale, who I am starting to work with
Shungite powder and iron filings, Obsidian, epoxy resin




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Finally starting to learn something new in the class. I voiced my concerns about class content and was heard. I’m happy with how the teacher is flexible and adjusts the classes based on feedback.
I called on Prince Orobas a couple days ago for an introduction. Unfortunately at some point in the last couple days I spilled the coffee offering on the sigil

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Demons love coffee :slightly_smiling_face:

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I found this in my notes today from a while ago. I also asked my mom about yin yang water and she doesn’t know if it makes a difference which goes first- hot or cold water. i guess I’ll write the tutorial and leave that part open

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I did this working/invocation from Beelzebub: Lord of the Flies The Nine Demonic Gatekeepers Compendium 6. This one was written by Asenath Mason, which to quote from the book
“is a sort of spiritual immunity by infecting yourself with pestilence that Beelzebub represents…like a ‘vaccine’”
It’s supposed to be for improved spiritual protection.
I indeed felt really drunk after drinking the sacrament, which had a minimal amount of rum in it, but got very dizzy and vomited.


I also made this sigil coaster for Azazel using a sigil from EA Koetting with pieces of red jasper and obsidian.

I made the skull for my altar a while ago with deer antler tips.

Today I took a nap with my Lilith portal/black mirror and I went somewhere again. It felt so real. I called out for my boyfriend upon returning because it was so vivid.
There was water everywhere. It wasn’t very clean, it was cold, and it was everywhere. My boyfriend met me where I entered this world/timeline with a scuba tank and said I needed to follow him underwater so “they” don’t see me.
The world is in ruins, sky was ashy grey with debris floating around, and our families are gone. We were among the remaining surviving humans and something had taken over. I kept myself submerged breathing through the mouthpiece (if I remember correctly it’s called an octopus?) The bubbles surfaced where my boyfriend was kicking. I guess he’d learned to swim. I opened my eyes underwater and saw pieces of an airplane and some jellyfish. No other fish though.
We went to a hideout where we dried off and met an older woman who was a doctor. I was sad that the world had gone to shit before I could finish medical school. She offered to teach me anyways. We need more healers, she said.
Whenever I tried to warn my past self, who I could connect and communicate with somehow, something else would dig its claws into me and hold my mouth shut. I kept trying anyways and actually woke up at one point just to call out to my boyfriend who came in but I was then paralyzed, and shortly after, I slipped back into my dream/trip right where I left off.
The building/hideout had a makeshift greenhouse but overall housed very few people. Probably less than 10. We can’t trust everyone, I was told. Some had allied with “them”. I had a feeling that “they”, whatever they were, were telepathic. Whenever I panicked and wanted to warn my past self, “they” knew somehow.
Something was strange about the world. I asked what year it was and heard that whatever happened had messed with time itself. Somehow it was every year all at once. There were aspects of the environment that appeared to defy the laws of physics. Debris that floated around, parts of distant places seemed to exist in the same space. Like seeing Paris and Shanghai at the same time in the same place but also knowing the two cities are nowhere near each other. At one place, it looked like the pieces of a dismantled grandfather clock were just drifting among fragments of things from the past and future just floating around. I think that’s why I was able to reach my past self. Time itself had changed. I thought, Wtf happened to the world?

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I had an apocalypse dream last night too. No one survived, because humans couldn’t act rationaly and see past themselves as individuals in the face of an organized and rational enemy (with superior strength, technology, and ability).

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That sounds like what “they” were. Somehow they always knew whenever I even thought about warning my past self in my dream. I’m not sure hiding me underwater did anything. I wonder if they’re already here and sending us hints.

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Doubt it. If they whatever whoever they are are the baddies then that wouldn’t make any sense. More likely if it’s a future or potential future of our earth then the resistance has members who have learnt to use mental powers and are trying to give a heads up to whoever they can reach. Of course, if the enemy are telepathic then they’d already know an alert went out to you and others and be preparing for whatever future you would do if you survived and they’d be plotting to make sure you didn’t.

Gosh that sounds like a plot line for a new terminator movie though doesn’t it? Future selves trying to save past selves and others?

Anyhow, I doubt whoever they are they’d be alerting peeps if they were the baddies.

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True, all good points. It does sound like a Terminator movie!

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People only seem to have apocalyptic dreams when they’re really stressed or uncertain of the future. They were almost a required topics on Sunday when I was growing up. When times were “good”, there was less talk of it. When they weren’t so good, there was a lot more. I stopped paying attention to them when I had heard “any day now” for over a decade and their predictions hadn’t changed, but Time and Nature didn’t seem to get the memo.

I chalk it up to stress. I’ll have battlefield dreams where I get to feel alive again for one last mission and the choice is mine to stay and fight or leave with the others (the battlefield is already strewn with the dead and quite established). I send the others on and get ready to take as many out as I can. Same type of dream, really, except I’m fleeing Life instead of Death.

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I have trying to catch up on sleeping, also without the mirror. Stress makes my dreams weird and vivid as is, and I needed/still need rest. Weirdly I’m starting to understand physics better than before. Maybe the planetary magick challenge has something to do with it. I’m not great at it still but I’m not drowning as much.

Sleep tea:
anise seeds, catnip, chamomile, elderberries, hibiscus, jasmine, lavender, valerian, violet

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Samael oil / incense
Acacia
Basil
Black tea
Cinnamon
Copal
Devil’s Claw
Dragon’s Blood
Frankincense
Jasmine
Mullein
Red pepper, crushed
Rosemary
Tobacco
Wormwood
If oil, small piece of obsidian and base of almond or olive oil

my earliest “athame” lol approx 25 years ago

I might make way too many incenses, but never in large amounts unless it’s for my Etsy shop, which currently only has about 15 different herb mixes in it, give or take, in the forms of oils, powders, candles, etc…
Mixing herbs has largely been a part of my getting-into-ritual-mood pre-ritual and I learn a little bit every time I make something new.

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Nice. Are those … Unicorns on the athame?
I like reading your entries they’re informative (and often inspiring. Especially the ones relating to plant products like herbs and resins).

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Thank you! I am glad that my journal has been informative and inspiring. I learn a lot from the forum and am glad to contribute.
Yes those are unicorns - maybe I can incorporate it into some inner child work somehow.

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