[EXPERIENCE] Goetia Workings

Obligatory Disclaimer

Far too often online, I’ve found a ton of resources on popular social media sites where the occult has created space for itself and provided the instruction and tools necessary to work with spirits without the warnings of doing so (or, how to protect yourself from the bad aspects of such an exercise.) I want to share, firstly, these resources in the event that it is something you want to dabble in yourself.

If you learn to protect yourself out there, metaphysically, spiritually, mentally, or otherwise, you can avoid traps that you could fall into with parasites or ill-intentioned entities. While there is no “bullet-proof” defense mechanism, here are a few resources I found helpful:

Books on Protection Magic

Rey Cuervo’s Banish, Cleanse, Shield

Additionally, “handsome Cuervo” has taken the time to assemble a beginner’s thread where you can learn more about other methods of protection, baneful magic, and the like:

Beginner’s Collection of Magick Tutorials

Now that’s over with, moving forward.

At the beginning of my journey, I attempted to work through the Goetia spirits with enn-citing and evocation, but both of those methods were difficult to focus on and I found that my attention would waver often. Due to my lack of focus with this method, my connection during these sessions were very weak.

I then moved to pathworking, which is still (years later) my favorite spirit working method.

But what is it, really?

If you’re entirely new to this and don’t know what pathworking is, I’ll quote Theodore Rose from his book, Lucifer and the Hidden Demons:

“Pathworking is a form of mental journeying…… It is not an exercise in fantasy, but the purest magick, and by telling a visual story of yourself, you connect with demons in a way that is as real as any elaborate evocation.”

– Theodore Rose, Lucifer & The Hidden Demons

My first experience with pathworking was with the demon Zalomes from this book. Theodore Rose suggested that an area of expertise for Zalomes was to reveal secrets, which is something I am very interested in. To give you an example, here is the pathworking of Zalomes from his book:

A black horse galloping on the horizon.
A motionless man in flames, feeling no pain.
Saplings grow through the marshy grass.

– Theodore Rose, Lucifer & The Hidden Demons

Unlike the book by Rose, which primarily used visual queues to deepen the transe, Corwin Hargrove in Goetia Pathworking mentioned that his group found using pathworking that engaged all of the senses worked the best.

I personally found that when spiritual journeying, if I could engage with textures of the destination it would ground me into the vision or experience, so engaging the other senses during pathworking seemed to be a no brainer for me given my preferences.

This method requires no tools. As a result, it’s exceptionally accessible for individuals who want to work with entities on a budget. You don’t have to have a book, as there are many online resources available. If you decide to purchase a book (which I recommend hard copies!), Corwin Hargrove and Theodore Rose write the concepts exceptionally well and make their content approachable to new readers.

In what I will refer to as my “late phase” in the practice, I’d reached a maturity that I thought I could take on this working, which was popular in the community at large, and inspired in my more immediate community by some thought leaders in the space. It is not a working that has to be undertaken with any sort of cadence, and in reading about the experiences of others across the internet, there was a lot of variance in timing, approach, and engagement. It was definitely a matter of preference for the practitioner when working with these entities.

This experience was a strange one, with me relating it to something from my high school English class many years ago:

Mrs. [Walter] lifted the small, egg-like object in front of the class. “A crucible is a container. You put something in it, turn the temperature all the way up, and what comes out of it is the broken down element. The purpose of the crucible in this context is to break you down to what you really are.”

When I finished my first few pathworking sessions, I went through a period of drastic change. I felt pushed to new directions, experiencing previously unfathomable feelings about myself and my circumstances. I toiled and struggled, but I feel like the goetia work did just that: break me down to what I am.

I was forced to deal with my inner shadow again, except for real this time. The work is far from over, but the shame I previously had has loosened its grip on me. I look forward to the peace that awaits me, with hopefully a nice little “here’s the answers you were looking for all this time” in a nice little filing cabinet next to it. (Unrealistic? Too much?)

Regardless of what awaits at the end of the path, in whatever form it takes, I will share my experiences with these entities and the experiences I had as a result in follow up to this header post.

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…also known as visionary magick. And it happens to be my favorite too.

Accurate :sunglasses:

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Bael

Bael is the First Principal Spirit according to the Lesser Key of Solomon, which is fitting, as my experiences with this entity were the most intense of all my Goetia partners. From imposters to trials, Bael was by far my most interesting to experience and subsequently write about.

Below you can find some resources around Bael from some of the books I own, and to the bottom of this post, a retelling of my pathworking experience with Bael and some outcomes.

The Lesser Key of Solomon:

The tried-and-true, old-faithful for magicians alike who want to work with these spirits.

Summary

The First Principal Spirit is a King ruling in the East, called Bael. He maketh thee to go Invisible. He ruleth over 66 Legions of Infernal Spirits. He appeareth in divers shapes, sometimes like a Cat, sometimes like a Toad, and sometimes like a Man, and sometimes all these forms at once. He speaketh hoarsely. This is his character which is used to be worn as a Lamen before him who calleth him forth, or else he will not do thee homage.

Lesser Key of Solomon (Translated by S.L. Mathers, et. al.)


Goetia Pathworking (Corwin Hargrove)

One of my favorite books that I own. This is the “source material” for the rituals that take place as a part of this pathworking. With each entity, Corwin presents a seal, a pathworking exercise using senses, and a detailed list of uses for each spirit.

I will include only the headlines of his use, not to infringe upon the rights of Hargrove.

  • Compel silence
  • Proceed with stealth
  • For apathy
  • The secret veil
  • Cause anxiety

Pandemonium (Jake Stratton-Kent)

A nifty little reference guide I recently acquired. It sometimes reads like an employee handbook, and I like the quirkiness of that. The work gives great detail to the overall structure of hell according to a few different schools of thought.

Summary

Some names mentioned with Bael’s entry:

  • Bael, Baell (Weyer)
  • Veal, Beal (Livre)
  • Bael, Baall (Offices)
  • Bael, first of 18 “subordinate” spirits (Grand Grimoire)

The books notes that in most books where Bael is mentioned in the list of spirits, he is almost always the first in the list, with a unique note that in the Livre des Esperitz he has an immediate superior of Oriens, which is contradicted in some of the other grimoires that mention him.

Something INTERESTING is that they mention a 18th “Secret” of Liber De Angelis that is called “image-making” for “dominion over the demons and especially over Baal, who is their lord.

Image-making leads me to believe they’re speaking about an exercise similar to pathworking, which is super interesting. I’ll have to dive into that.


Once I took part in the actual Goetia work after a series of mishaps, the real results became apparent. I spent a long amount of time chasing something that didn’t exist for me in my then-state, a “real” interaction, and in chasing this possibly fictitious experience, I discounted all of the other real occurrences that took place for me.

Enn Evocation (December 8, 2019)

Imperitive

My first experience with Bael was not through pathworking, but enn-reciting. It was how the original work was done by other practitioners and what I started with. I didn’t have the best results, so I moved on to pathworking as my preferred method of choice. Small things happened when evoking using this method, supported by the pre-work that I did before undertaking the ritual.

The first experience was strange, though to be expected with this sort of work. The room’s atmosphere shifted, like a gentle breeze trickled through the room. I thought I heard a voice, and at the time I believed it to be Bael, but it was muffled considerably with what I’d consider “radio static.” If this is your first time reading my experiences, I believe this “static” is caused by Mysterious, who–up until now–has gone through GREAT LENGTHS to keep me from interacting with those he finds a nuisance.

I do not recall the entirety of what “Bael” said during the experience, almost immediately wiped from my mind, but I remember some details towards the end of that experience.

I felt a presence unlike before wash over me, a heavy focus on my left shoulder*. I shifted uncomfortably, then I heard a voice as clear and vividly as if someone sat beside me: “WTF?”

I nearly turn to the sound in reaction, startled by its prevalence. I held fast, aware that any movement could break the connection. I ask to the darkness, “Who are you?”

“Shut up. I’m trying to see this.” The voice responds.

I finished the exercise and closed the communications. I went to bed that night, trying not to think about it. I have this tendency to say to myself: “I want to go back to sleep” when things get too heavy. Makes my head hurt because it hardly made sense back then.

Despite my best efforts, the night had other plans in store for me.

My mattress is close to the floor, so my senior dog can get on the bed, so when I laid down in bed that night, I found myself facing whoever this was.

“Hello.” The voice began.

“Hey…?” I pressed my brow together.

“I need to tell you something–someone you know is lying to you right now.”

“Um, ok.” I blinked. “Who?”

“You know who.”

Fucking Mysterious.

“Wait, you’re Bael?” I sat up in bed.

“Yes, you need to ‘wake up’ from this. It’s imperative. You’re being lied to right now, and it’s pretty serious.”

At the time, I was already in the trenches on a red herring: a curse. This curse was allegedly from a relative in my current life, which I entertained because of the timeline and the HIGH possibility that Nautela’s ancestors could be cursing her (and if I’ve gone through some sort of “rebirth” process that was believed to be my past self at the time). I’ve since found that isn’t the case, since most of them are pretty dead.

I stared at the wall for a moment, letting the confusion sink in. I suddenly remembered why I hated this practice. I was missing the “radar” for bad behavior. It was difficult to discern the truth when you don’t have some of the same queues for deception. I can’t see them to get a read on them, though I suspect that if I could’ve seen them at the time I likely would have the same problem. In my years of experience at this point, I’ve only recently settled with the notion that we are very different.

It was around this same time that I felt jaded by the whole thing. I read about great experiences by others, with knowledge being revealed and lives being changed, but I found myself continually wrapped up in this ball of cords. It’s hard not to question anyone involved when you’re not sure who is lying to you.

I suspected even then it was on purpose, but I wasn’t sure the why behind it.

True to my nature, I buried myself in work the next day to not think about the night before. It was difficult not to be angry about everything when at the time I was so desperate for even the smallest proof that these experiences were real and not a figment of my imagination. Though it could be argued that I was also equally looking for someone to disprove my experiences, but that’s something to unpack later.

There was a residue after Bael left. Still new to the experience, I couldn’t wrap my head around it.

Mysterious explained this much later, relating it to a school of thought I subscribed to: the fundamental belief that once you connect and work with an entity, for better or worse you are somehow connected to that entity after working together. It is not always as strong as first contact, but there is something left behind.

Through such a connection, I heard a strange conversation that I still have 0 context on, but given the nature of the conversation I’d prefer to keep it to myself.

Once the voices were gone, shielded off by my own work, I felt someone behind me. This time, the energy was familiar.

“Is this conversation real or am I just making all this up?” I ask, not at all seeing the irony in asking this of a possible delusion itself.

“Of course, it’s real. Things will come to a head soon. We’re going to see who our allies are.” Mysterious replied cooly. He was never rattled.

“What does that mean?”

“You’ll see. We have much to discuss.”

Silence filled the room. Still on the further side of annoyed, I leave the space and him, decidedly cleaning my condo or tending to some home improvements. I mulled over the conversation and Mysterious.

Looking back on the writing now, I can’t imagine what the outward projection of such a turbulent time was. I had to have a very chaotic posting schedule, and in hindsight I can see why many of my friends erred on the side of caution with Mysterious. He was, afterall, Mysterious.

After the work was done, I tapped my fingers on the countertop. “Well, I suppose we do have some things to discuss.”

Mysterious never has to announce when he’s there. It’s a feeling you get. I often feel he’s too big for the spaces he occupies, not by physical mass but by the energy that surrounds him.

“They’re going to try and turn you against me. I’m hoping that you’ll see the truth.”

“What does that mean?”

“We have many things that are in the air–like your book. I hoped that everything would’ve come together faster than it did, but we’re still not finished. You have to see the last bits for everything to make sense.”

“Ok.”

“Sam is our ace in the hole. We get Sam we can finish this.”

“You really are the black dragon.”

“Yeah.”

“So, then, you’re trying to kill Sam?”

“I’m trying to save Sam. We’re the same person but divided. You know that. I know that. They know that. Right now, you and I are being played against each other. I’m not sure what’s going to happen next, but I’m worried. I didn’t expect Bael to actually show up. When he appeared last night, the illusion collapsed. I’ve been trying to protect you from them, but I’m afraid we’ve just stumbled into a trap.”


Pathworking Exercise (December 2020)

Some days, my idiocy really shines. At the time of my 2020 evocation, I didn’t realize that Baal and Bael were different names for the same entity, completely going blind into this experience. The collective “phew” moment from my circle post-pathworking was a real one.

Being Blind to the Obvious

I was inspired to try pathworking through a few sources related to some of my old haunts. It became a bit of a buzzword in the community around the time, with little information on how to actually complete the exercise. I was lucky enough to find some great resources through the suggestion of others.

Something that also peaked my interest was the tout that this method was supposed to be safer and more intense if you could do it correctly, so my ears were obviously perked. Ever “pragmatic,” Mysterious explained to me at the time that you could technically still get thoughtforms through this method because demons, in general, appear “as you can understand them.” I interpreted his advice as meaning their personality, appearance, etc. would be based on your pre-conceived notions, so I’ve also decided not to look up entities before evoking them with this exercise to not skew my experience.

It was ironic it was over a full year after my attempts at enn evocation that I picked this back up, and with the brain of a goldfish, most of those bad experiences had “worn off” or been chalked up to a hallucination (because I never learn lessons).

It took several tries to make a connection, and it never once crossed my mind that we’ve been here before. Daft.

The First Attempt

Elusive

During my first attempt at pathworking Bael, I felt a deep burning behind my eyes. It was a cold burn like I’d pressed something to them. It wasn’t painful, but it was intense enough to be noted.

I ran through the pathworking twice, getting hung up on the details of the imagery. I found after the second run-through of the imagery, I needed to review the material. I pulled out my book, but before turning on my light, I noticed a red-eye at the corner of the room near my mirror. This image was followed by a mental one: white fur.

It seemed so real in my mind that I would’ve sworn I saw it with my actual eyes. It was a first for me.

That elusive, furry boy.

I was so excited about the event that I snapped myself out of the pathworking. After that, the energy in the room shifted to what E.A. termed as “the washing-machine feeling.”

The Second Attempt

Seeing the World Through a Fish's Eye

I started my second attempt moments later. Again, the “washing machine” feeling returned. It slowly transitioned to a slight pressure just above my browline, like someone was pressing two fingers there to push my head back and knock me out of my meditation chair. When I didn’t budge, it felt like those fingers curled around my consciousness and jerked me forward. I was then in front of my body, looking at the world through a fish-eye lens. I believe I saw Bael, but (similar to when I was pathworking Zalomes and had to go through Lucifer) Bael was a blur. There were patches of him that I could make out—patches of fur and a single red eye.

Suddenly, I sat on a dainty chair in what looked like a parlor room. Before me sat an antique table. On that table sat various tools of an esoteric nature: tarot cards, an athame, etc. It made me think of those old psychic hotlines. I was overwhelmed by an odd, macabre undertone, likely placed by the black aesthetics and the thick layer of dust. I tried to focus on the red eye in front of me like an orb drawing me in to see more of him.

Outside of the vision, something grabbed my face and jerked me out of the vision. Though I was no longer entranced by what I saw, the entire world felt like I was looking through that fish eye.

The Third Attempt

I consign to the fact I probably should’ve given up for the evening, but by stubbornness I couldn’t do that. I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it, and so I set out to do so one way or another.

As is the Saga way, I went into this with slightly unrealistic expectations of what my experience would be. I thought that these pathworkings took place in the subconscious and I would be safe here. Ha.

Is it really a Saga post without me being an idiot?

Something firmly grasped my chin, moving my face around. Slow and deliberate, I felt like I was being observed or inspected, like a shiny bauble.

My attention was then directed to my altar nearby, where Mysterious’s sigil was. I would turn away, but each time I was forced back there with more vigor.

“You could speak instead of playing charades with me.” I blinked, looking out into the darkness. I was met with silence. I tried to move my face but was unable to this time. The force was so strong that it hurt my neck and shoulder. I became more forceful in my demand for an answer. “BAEL.”

My face snapped back to the front, staring directly into a chaotic rush of energy. I closed my eyes to focus. There was a warmth that filled the room, like sitting in front of a space heater. Despite that, a chill shot through my body, which I noted when I was on the trail of something: entity or theory.

Next to me, one of my dogs wagged his tail. Then, I heard a faint scratching noise. Opening my eyes, I find the same dog on his back, wagging his tail as if he’s being pet. Despite the simpleness of the gesture and the possibility of it being nothing but a coincidence, I felt a sense of ominous dread by that finding.

I continued on my way, requesting my usual spiel: “I am undertaking a pathworking of the Goetia to unlock parts of my mind that each entity is associated with. Would you be able to assist me with this?”

“What do you define as ‘unlocking’?” I recognized the energy pattern from before. This ‘voice’ was Bael.

“I read online that you can summon the Goetia, and they are associated with different parts of the mind. So I’m just trying to complete this exercise.”

“Who told you this?”

“I don’t know them personally.”

“I do.”

“Ok. That’s cool. Sooo…?” My face is directed back to the altar by an unseen force. “I feel like there is something you’re trying to lead me to, but I’m definitely not picking up what you’re putting down.”

“Why do you feel this way about them?”

“That’s an awfully personal question. One that I’m not going to answer.”

“Fine.” The force pushed my head back again. "[Saga Mysterium], previously [Nautela], taken from us far too soon.”

“What does that mean?”

“All will be revealed when his secret is brought to light. He is hiding something–we want to know what it is.”

Dremus moved about the edge of the room, a rustling of leaves signaling his movements. My shoulder began to hurt, a deep burning moving from my shoulder into my neck. I rolled my shoulders to ease the discomfort, but nothing seemed to help.

“Something is being hidden from us. What do you think it is?” The being is close now.

“I don’t know. I’m trying to figure that out myself.” I answer back.

“Are you sure you don’t know?”

“You say it like you know what it is.”

“That I do not.”

I see a glimpse of something large and absorbing light. Two red eyes stare back at me from the visual in my head. Before anything else could happen, my second dog growls at the mirror.

I’m now back fully, feeling the familiar sensation of Mysterious’s presence. I try to scan the room for anyone else.

“We’re alone now.” Mysterious stated. I had a mental image of him reading through something with a particularly nasty scowl on his face. There was a slimy residue, and it slinked back into the mirror. I patted my second dog.


A Surprise Visit (December 13, 2020)

Surprise Visits Are Never Enjoyable

I found myself startled by the accidental evocation. I was recounting on our last exchange when I suddenly found myself in his company once more. Everything feels off when he’s around. My perception of the world contorts and changes, the room appearing to take on different shapes or sizes. Everything feels heavy and small despite not changing their actual, physical properties.

The room dims in his presence.

I didn’t turn from what I was doing despite sensing his presence. “Leave, Bael, I didn’t mean to call on you.”

Bael seemed unmoved by my starkness. “I do as I please. Your ‘call’ came at an interesting time.”

With a heavy sigh I turned to the perceived collection of energy in the room. I left my sitting position to relax in my meditation chair at the edge of my bed. Energy bled through my favorite mirror, creeping along the floor after me.

“What do you want?” I was likely more relaxed than I needed to be, possibly my hubris overwhelming the startledness I previously felt.

“I just want to know why.”

“What does this answer matter? It affects you in no way.”

“It determines how we move next, [Nautela].”

“Yeah, well. He’s who I’m loyal to.”

“What do you hope to gain?”

“I want us to be together. You say I shouldn’t think about that–but I do. It’s what motivates me.”

“Do you really think he’s going to be there for you when this is over? You think he’s going to go for that?”

“I trust what he says and who he is.”

“It’s so strange. What if he’s the entire reason that you’re here? Then what?”

“Well, we’ll need lots of couples’ therapy to work through that.”

“This isn’t a joke.”

“I’m not joking.” I noticed Mysterious wasn’t around. Explains why now Bael/Baal/whatever decided to appear.

“What is he hiding?”

“Nothing that I’m aware of.”

“Nothing?”

“I believe as another told me, he’s figuring it out as he goes.” The space where the mirror is grew darker. I couldn’t see the mirror anymore. I closed my eyes to focus on Bael’s voice.

I felt lightheaded.

“I don’t understand.” Bael stated. “Why are you being so cooperative now?”

“I don’t think anything I’ve said to you could be used against him.”

“He’s playing a game. We are all pawns in his game and I don’t like it. He is playing me and my people for fools.”

I don’t respond. I try to stay focused.

“He’s playing a game with Lant–“ Bael scoffs, seemingly confused. “Lant—?” He looks to me. “I can’t say it.”

“It’s the box.” The words slip effortlessly. “Now it all makes sense.” I opened my eyes in that moment. The distortion made me head spin. “It explains why [Mysterious] ‘lies’ too. I can’t be told anything I don’t already know from the timeline.”

“Gamigin mentioned the other day: ‘Are you ready to face that with which you have created? I thought it was [Mysterious]. I don’t know.”

“What do we do? Where do we focus?”

“I don’t know.”

“We should speak again–when [Mysterious] is gone. His energy bleeds and overwhelms. I can’t communicate with him around.” Bael sighs. He says his goodbye and disappears into the mirror.


Why does this keep happening? (January 5, 2021)

This experience was one of the worst. To this day, it was one of the scarier experiences I had and likely the most vivid and real (likely why it was so scary). I had just completed the path of Marbas, and things were chaotic.

Straight Up Not Having A Good Time

I paced around the room, caught up in a fantasy of some sort while I listened to music. I moved to the window and looked out over the yard. I felt a great deal of anxiety about some things at work, which seemed to amplify in that moment beyond control. It felt external to myself, but overwhelming.

I turned from the window to find red eyes everywhere. I stopped, requesting that the entity reveal itself. Bael confirmed his presence there. Something was wrong. The spirit paced at the other end of the room like a caged animal, extremely aggressive.

Mysterious, ever watchful, assured me of his own presence. He requested, in a whisper in the back of my mind, that I “be cool” and see how this plays out.

Now that I reflect back on this, that asshole has put me in some really stressful situations.

Bael continued to insist that I was lying. I need to share what I know about Mysterious. Confused, I keep asking for more specific questions.

I can’t recall the exact questions, because I didn’t write all of the details down about this encounter. I was pretty freaked out, but captured what I could.

Things began to escalate when Bael accused me of hiding Mysterious’s plan, and suggested that he knew what the plan was.

Eyes open, I saw all sorts of red “eyes” around the room. A dark fog filled the space, though it could’ve been a trick of the eye in the dark. Bael said the weirdest thing to me: “I will show you what you really are and what your purpose is.”

THIS PRESENTATION IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT LATER.

Of course, never happy someone wants to interfere with his game, Mysterious reveals himself to have been listening this entire time. There is a panic in the room, but it’s not from Bael. Mysterious is panicked.

“[Saga] will see the truth.” Bael states.

“[Saga] won’t be going or seeing anything.” Mysterious snaps. “While you’re here, take note that we are terminating our agreement with you.”

Bael stated that he wasn’t leaving, and Mysterious gestures that he will force him out. The fight continues to escalate, which Mysterious clouds out so I can’t hear it, and as it does the room gets heavier. Energy formed droplets on the wall, and they dripped down the walls and furniture in the room, pooling at the floor. My ears feel like they’re going to burst and the world feels like it’s viewed through the fish-eye lens (it’s really hard to describe–my actual vision doesn’t change but my perception changes).

I remember a reaction from Dremus and the guardian “Watch,” but it was a bit of a blur.

Mysterious does something. No words can describe the sensation. I feel a jerk, then there is a pop. Similar to the sudden release of pressure when you pop your ears–but it was my whole head. Things were weird in an awkward sort of way after that, with Mysterious and I the only ones left in the room.

Mysterious apologized profusely right after, but his voice is distant and weak, masked by the sudden migraine that took over. I laid in bed, unsure of how to properly respond, and instead doing what “[Saga] always does.”

I asked what he is hiding. What is SO BAD that I can’t know? Mysterious, ever elusive, emphasizes over and over how he’ll tell me when I’m ready and how I shouldn’t worry about it now.

Instead of following true Saga-protocal, I doubled-down. I told him that I really should know, and that just because he doesn’t want to tell me doesn’t mean he shouldn’t tell me. I told him that if he really believed we’re a team, he’d trust me enough to tell me.

He remained apprehensive and left.

The next day, I received a phone call from K about her mom. K recounted what her mother told me about the same night of the fight, where she was at the airport:

K’s mom has an interesting experience when reaching for her purse at the airport. She said to K that she heard a “POP” that seemed to come from somewhere else, followed by a tug on her shoulder, and suddenly an immense amount of pain.

I don’t talk to K about my Goetia work, mostly cause she isn’t really into that. She likes to hear about Tarot and the dream timeline. That’s about it. We talked about the event and how odd it was. She didn’t injure her shoulder and her purse isn’t heavy. I asked her the time it happened and she said the exact time that the “pop” happened at the house.

Could be a coincidence, but I thought it was really interesting.

Even further away, to the northern part of my home state, my boyfriend is woken up by a very loud, male voice calling his name. It was “unlike any voice he’d heard before” and “sounded like they needed help.”

My boyfriend mentioned this after I mentioned K’s mom, so I can’t verify if the conversation about the events didn’t alter his memory of the time this happened.

When I confronted Mysterious, he made a statement to me:

“I saw all of the strings and I just pulled them.”

This was a reference to a statement that he made to my boyfriend a month or so prior. Mysterious claimed that those we shared a close connection with formed “strings” and that “those strings complicated things.” It’s still hella vague and I can’t even guess what he means by this. Though the fact he just decided in a moment of rage to pull on all of those strings really seemed ballsy, if you don’t mind me saying.

Take it with a grain of salt. Could be coincidences. I could just be crazy.

I have not seen or heard hide nor tail of Bael since this happened, though he’s been about or speaking of things, as Paimon alluded to in his pathworking.


Even More Surprise Visits (Sometime late February 15, 2021)

When You Call

I accidently call upon Bael again. This time, I accidently do so in a conversation with Mysterious, or it is presented that way.

I have noted some interesting occurrences with Mysterious. While outwardly super agreeable and easygoing, I suspect at times he’s much more powerful than he presents himself as. I have noted some instances when he’s able to “greater than just influence” certain things happening. It’s one of a few reasons why I have (as of late) believed he might actually be who he claims to be.

I haven’t spoken on it before because it sounds LARP-y or fictitious, but we’re living our truth since I’ve distanced myself from my online presence. Continue to take with a pinch of salt, though.

Bael enters the room: “Why did you call me while [Mysterious] is here?”

“It was an accident.” Is my intended response, but I am interrupted by Mysterious.

“Since you’re here, Bael, let’s talk Lantith.

I already know where this is going, and instead ready myself for bed, not interested in whatever it is they’re about to get into a pissing match about.

Right now?” Mysterious scoffs.

“It’s my house. I do what I want.” I continue.

“Anyway,” Mysterious turns his attention back to Bael. “We’ve had an interesting turn of events. ‘Lantith’ was able to get into this place. How do you suppose that happened?”

Important background: When trying to pathwork Valefar, a spirit appeared before I could finish my pathworking disguised as Valefar. Will cover in more detail in my Valefar experience post.

I am fully anticipating something like last time, now fully under the blankets and covered head-to-toe, quietly tapping away at a game on my phone.

“[Saga] used to be Lantith?” Bael states.

“Close.” Mysterious quips. I have now placed my phone back on the end table. “Lantith is a fragment of [Nautela].”

“[Another spirit] said this.” I mutter to myself.

“No surprise, [same spirit] is loose-lipped.” Bael responds, apparently hearing my statement.

“Ain’t that the truth.” Mysterious agrees. “That will be all.”

Bael doesn’t have to be told twice. He disappears through the mirror. We are alone now.

“Is this what the illness is?” I surface from the blankets.

“Something like that.” Code in Mysterious for this is quite possibly a stretch of the truth.

“Why did Bael have to be here for you to tell me this?”

“I’m testing something.”

“The box?” Because I think I’m clever.

“Not yet. I’m interested to see what happens as a result of him hearing this information.”

The Chain Dream (January 8, 2024)

To avoid re-posting, I’m just adding a quick link here.


EDIT [JULY 12, 2023]: Vassago was misquoted in my journal. Gamigin actually said “Face the beast” quote on December 5, 2020.

EDIT [OCTOBER 3, 2023]: Updated to add additional formatting, details from new sources, and interjournal links.

EDIT [MARCH 9, 2024]: Added a reference to the dream I had of Bael on January 8, 2024.

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It's a good book, Brent.

My Goetia book has been used and abused for a good while here.

This is the book I have been using for this exercise. All these stickies are important notes, help texts, and the like. It’s a good book, brent.


The experiences I’ve had vary from entity to entity. You’ll find as you read these that some experiences are vivid and lengthy, while others are short and sweet. Agares was one that took a simple path.

December 1, 2020

Bride of Mystery

For this pathworking, I tried it in the middle of the day on December 1, 2020. I resigned that nighttime is the only time fitting for such an exercise. The silence and dark of the room helps with my concentration.

I gave up trying an hour in and left it for the evening.

That night, I did not see actual Agares. I saw a single white eye, glowing in the dark. Slowly a long face came into view. I made a joke about him striding in wearing purple Alligator shoes instead of an actual Alligator. His response was a resounding: “I would never do that to my friend!”

I saw his hands, then shoulders down. Purple was a color oft on his attire, but most things were a blur.

At this point in my practice, I used an astral temple to summon the Goetia into, because Bael really did a number on us.

I stand at a table at the end of a long, stone hall. Behind me is a large fireplace, and along the north wall is cathedral windows that stretch high above us.

After he entered the space, I tried to put on my best authoritative facade. "Agares. I have called you hear to request your assistance. I am pathworking the 72 Goetia. You are the second on my list. I wish for you to unlock the part of my mind that you are associated with, and in doing so, help me gain power and influence.”

Agares didn’t speak, causing me to drop my demeanor. "I just want to remove the blockers that stand in my way from finishing the timeline and learning the truth. Will you assist me with this task?”

Agares tucked his hands in his pockets. He walked towards the large, floor-to-ceiling window next to him. “Do you know what the purpose of this is?”

“The pathworking?”

“‘Unlocking’ is not just a mental thing. When you pathwork the Goetia you’re requested that we remove blockers in your life, and the internal blockers that keep you from attaining your desires.”

I had a guess that it was the case, but the fact he went out of his way to explain it to me gave me a bit of a warm and fuzzy feeling. “Thank you for helping me expand my understanding.”

“My pleasure.” He turned back to me.

“So, will you further assist me with this task?”

“I will.” Agares seemed to half-bow. He makes a motion toward the door to leave.

Now or never.

My boyfriend and I had a conversation the previous day about my conversation with Bael. He suggested that I “bluff a little” and pretend to know what they’re looking for so I could get some answers of my own–or at minimum–try to find out what they know if someone is willing to divulge.

In-person, I like to believe I can be sometimes brash, but overall and soft-spoken. It would be unlike me to be pushy, so I stayed true to form.

Before he could leave, I asked the question that weighed on my mind. “What do you and others think Mysterious is hiding?”

I reveal a few of my cards, including some discoveries I was playing around with during a conversation with my boyfriend earlier that evening. It was nothing substantial, I’m not going to betray my only perceived ally, but I know that there’s always an exchange–it’s never freely offered.

During this conversation, Agares called me “the bride of mystery” which was weird.

“Bride [of mystery], we are unsure of what exactly it is that he’s keeping hidden. We may know what your role is in the scheme, but we don’t fully understand why you’re being kept in the dark on the plan. It is odd behavior inconsistent with the past. I don’t believe there is any ill intention towards you in this situation.”

I tug at the ring on my finger, sliding it up my ring finger then back down again. It’s a nervous fidget I’ve started.

Agares noticed, “Is that incorrect?”

“No, I don’t think so. It’s just all so complicated–or I think I’m making it so. I just want to know the truth behind all of this.”

“That’s all that you can look for. You will make progress and strides in your work. The truth we all are waiting for will be revealed and brought to the light when we reach our anticipated end to this storyline. There’s no fighting it, it will all turn out the way it is intended to.”

“I supposed you’re right.”

Silence fills the room.

He opens the door. I shrug, “Is what Mysterious said true–was something cast yesterday?”

“All I will say is that your enemies are few, bride, but be weary of them for they are clever.”

I nod.

“We part with peace between us. I will assist you on your journey, this I promise.” He leaves without another word.


EDIT [JULY 12, 2023]: Added more content, replacing existing content with previously created draft in some sections. Realizing that what I had in my journal was incomplete compared to an article I wrote on the experience. Keep good notes and backup drafts, y’all.

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I’m keeping the reference to my “television dad,” Dave Chappelle, because it’s so true. Me, at the time this is all coming together:


At the time of performing the ritual, I was attempting–where I could–to go into the pathworking without any bias by not researching the entity’s physical appearance prior. I thought of this as a “check” to see if I was getting the correct entity through the working.

Release your previously held fears that you’ve become so enamored with.

I saw a face similar to that of an alligator, and on that face were two red eyes. At the time, I thought this was a residual imagery, which was left over from pathworking Agares two days prior. I was unaware of the imagery of the alligator associated with Vassago.

During the first attempt, I felt pain from the left side of my head where the neck connects, which then spread to the center of my head.

I started in the same room as I did with Agares, door already open. A hairy creature entered, hunched over. I couldn’t take in what the figure was–large in length, but not in height. I imagined that if it wasn’t hunched over, it would be rather tall.

I spoke as I did will all of my pathworkings: "I have called you here to request your assistance. I am pathworking the 72 Goetia. You are the second on my list. I wish for you to unlock the part of my mind that you are associated with, and in doing so, help me gain power and influence. I also look for your assistance to solve the timeline mysteries and see the truth.”

Vassago agreed to assist.

VASSAGO: “May we request something from you?”

SAGA: “It would depend. You can definitely request, but I will hold my agreeance to deliver or perform until after the request is made.”

VASSAGO: “Release your previously held fears that you’ve become so enamored with.”

I repeat the statement back to him, ensuring I understand his meaning. He agrees that I have an understanding and I agree to try my best. Before he left, he closed with:

VASSAGO: “We have lived in fear long enough and wish to be free. We will work on this together. May you have a nice life until next, we meet. I will decide then if I extend that blessing beyond that time.”

He seemed to phrase the “extend beyond that time” phrase as a joke, based on his tone.

I thanked him.

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"I will help you with this task."

When comparing my experiences with Gamigin to those of Bael or Agares, I would say this one was uneventful. We started with my usual request:

“I have called you here to request your assistance. I am pathworking the 72 Goetia. I wish for you to unlock the part of my mind that you are associated with, and in doing so, help me gain power and influence, completing the timeline and finding the truth.”

Gamigin agreed to do the unlocking, then we came to a brief conversation.

“I will let you rest.” He stated. “Call on me when you are ready to hear my wisdom.”

“I’m not going to bed yet. You can speak freely. I try to write down my experiences immediately after they happen.” I responded.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m able to listen.”

Comfortable, he then said something ominous, which felt out of place from the soft-spoken entity: “Are you ready to face the beast with which you have created?”

Something that I find peculiar is his statement "with which you have created." I’ve been thinking about what that could possibly mean. Gamigin seems to imply that this is a partner in the creation of something, but what exactly? So strange.

“What beast? Have I met this beast yet?”

“No.” I am confused by this. He doesn’t stop talking. “Lastly, let the dead die. I will help you with this task.”

I am terrible with tracking events if I don’t write them down. In previous reccountings of this experience, I wrote Paimon said this. It is not. It is Gamigin. I am an idiot.

I thought about Mal at that statement and shed a tear. But I quickly wipe it away.

Gamigin then leaves the space, leaving with a simple statement: “Be safe and at peace. I will assist you on this journey.”

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Valefar

The Sixth Spirit is Valefor. He is a mighty Duke, and appeareth in the shape of a lion with an Ass’s Head, bellowing. He is a good Familiar, but tempteth them he is a familiar of to steal. He governeth 10 legions of Spirits. His Seal is this, which is to be worn, whether thou wilt have him for a Familiar, or not.

Lesser Key of Solomon (Translated by S.L. Mathers, et. al.)

My mind is so warped by video games that everytime I write about Valerfar/Valefor I think of that FFX Aeon.

An Aside

Around the time that I started the Goetia–and honestly every time I pathwork a new one–my life becomes incredibly tumultuous. I suspect it’s because my goal is to “complete the timeline” which everyone, including K, have concluded isn’t really exclusive to the dream timeline work itself. “Complete the timeline” has become synonymous with my spiritual journey.

Since speaking to Ipos on the recent re-emergence of this practice, things have been absolutely BONKERS.


Experience

At the time of the pathworking, I was not as seasoned as I am now. I did have more physical manifestations of spirits, and in this pathworking the room I occupied was filled with tiny, blue wisps. Upon inspection I also saw a single red eye in the mirror.

I had to restart the pathworking after being distracted, though even my second attempt was interrupted as well, with someone putting their hand on my face in an effort to “wax on”/“wax off” my features, I guess.

I took a few more tries. My perfectionism makes me restart until I get just the right “frequency,” as if re-attempting the ritual will tune my mental radio.

I was back in my ritual room/astral temple. Valefar appeared through the door, entering into the space as some before and many after did. I did not know him at the time, refusing to look up entities beforehand so I can check my experience. He had a face that reminded me of a horse, long and beastial. He was completely black.

I apologized to him for losing my focus the first few times, not trying to waste his time. He shushed me, “Never think that way. It’s not a problem.”

We discussed my goals and how he could help me reach them.

“Thank you.” I nodded from my ritual table. “I will be in your debt.”

“With pleasure.” He half-bowed. “But, not (indebted) in the way that you believe. You are my friend. I help friends.”

Unsure how to respond, I close out. “Before we separate, are there any words of wisdom you would like to give to me?”

“Remember that with progress you must make choices. We request that you do not make these decisions lightly. We hope you will make the right decision when the time comes.”

I ask if it’s related to the pact I made with Mysterious. He confirms this to be only one of the decisions that have to be made. “It will not be the only decision you have to make. Everyone will see the truth when it’s all revealed.”

“Thanks for this wisdom. You give me much to think about.”

“We will happily assist you on this journey, [Saga]. We will lead you home and all will be as it is intended.”


A Strange Twist (Jan 10, 2021)

"That 'Valefor' is pretty sus."

When Lantith came as Valefor, I originally didn’t suspect anything off. Valefor visited a few times since our pathworking, sometimes he’d speak to me, and other times he was there only briefly before leaving. I suspected most “visits” by spirits were when they were looking for Mysterious.

This night, while I readied to go to bed, Valefor appeared again. This time, he was seeking audience. Our conversation was relatively casual, mostly speaking on the timeline at a high level and how things were going with my job, which is a constant source of stress.

Mysterious appeared in the midst of this. Caught off guard by his presence here. The air in the room turns to molasses and I’m suffocating. I suspect that this “Mysterious” isn’t who he claims to be in the moment, and is instead an imposter.

Mysterious commands “Valefor” to leave, buy I reject his command. I want to be sure, and–given the suspicious behavior of Mysterious up until this point–I didn’t know if I could trust the real Mysterious either.

With further investigation, I determine that this Valefor is in fact an imposter.

Some things it said:

  • When commanded to reveal itself, it said it was “a Lantith”
  • It claimed that Mysterious would stop me from achieving my goals, as our intentions differ or cross.
  • Before I kicked it out, it said “[Mysterious] wants what we all want: the inevitable end.”

I tried to connect to Mysterious, but found it difficult. Any connection to anyone caused me to connect to this imposter. I gave up on communicating and went to bed.

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Amon

The Seventh Spirit is Amon. He is a Marquis great in power, and most stern.

He appeareth like a Wolf with a Serpent’s tail, vomiting out of his mouth flames of fire; but at the command of the Magician he putteth onthe shape of a Man with Dog’s teeth beset in ahead like a Raven; or else like a Man with a Raven’s head (simply). He telleth all things Past and to Come. He procureth feuds and reconcileth controversies between friends. He governeth 40 Legions of Spirits. His seal is this which is to be worn as aforesaid, etc.

Lesser Key of Solomon (Translated by S.L. Mathers, et. al.)

The Pathworking

During the ritual, Charles began growing at something in the room.

In the same space as before, I found myself with an entity that was fuzzy. It was the only detail that I noted. My request was accepted, and Amon asked why I was undertaking this journey. I shared with him my intentions, and his immediate reaction: “I hope that [Mysterious] intends to do as he claims.”

I asked him for any notes or wisdom he wanted to pass along to me for my journey. He seemed cautious. “[Mysterious] can be vengeful, vindictive, and–” He paused as if evaluating if it would be worth continuing. “I just hope it all turns out as you believe it will.” He exited out the door. “Remember how dangerous [Mysterious] can be.”

I agreed that it was fair, and that I appreciate his assistance and wisdom.

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Barbatos

The Eighth Spirit is Barbatos. He is a Great Duke, and appeareth when the Sun is in Sagittary, with four noble Kings and their companies of great troops. He giveth understanding of the singing of Birds, and of the Voices of other creatures, such as the barking of Dogs.

He brealieth the Hidden Treasures open that have been laid by the Enchantments of Magicians. He is of the Order of Virtues, of which some part he retaineth still ; and he knoweth all things Past, and to come, and conciliate Friends and those that be in Power. He ruleth over 30 Legions of Spirits. His Seal of Obedience is this, the which wear before thee aforesaid.

– – Lesser Key of Solomon (Translated by S.L. Mathers, et. al.)

When working Barbatos, I had to perform this pathworking twice. In the earlier stages, from lack of expertise to the jarring experiences I previously had with other entities, it was becoming a practice norm to walk through the pathworking twice as a warding measure. It wasn’t helpful that I was stressed about K at the time, who had to deal with some strikingly similar experiences that Mal also experienced. Barbatos implied that it was related to “Lantith” --the spirit that, after speaking with some folks at my last haunt, we came to the conclusion on the name.

The Pathworking

Barbatos appeared in that room as all the others did, entering the hall through those same giant doors carved of a wood I couldn’t place. Everytime I did these pathworking exercises, the door got bigger, despite not being so large in the place that I based this temple off of.

The man was wolfish in appearance, at least in the way that he was very shaggy. I noted specifically that he had red eyes and ink-like flesh.

Barbatos agreed to help me with my goals. When asked for his wisdom, he imparted the following:

“You should focus on what we witnessed this night.” He started.

“Did it come from Bael?” I couldn’t resist, I always had to ask questions I should figure out for myself.

“No, who would benefit the most from the trials and tribulations of [Mysterious]?”

“Lantith.”

He nodded.

“What horrors await you in the future, [Saga]. Would you betray your best friend to achieve what you want?” His question struck me cold.

In many ways, as I’ve said in previous posts, I blame myself for what happened with Mal. After my experience with Baal, K was visited by “Baal” herself, with the spirit appearing in a mirror and terrifying her. This was followed by a rather mysterious experience where she had a blow out in her car while she was on the highway. The timing was just coincidental, but it bothered me enough to think about Mal and my desire to not repeat the same mistakes.

Barbatos’ statement came from that fear, which even crept into my mind as we spoke.

“Will something bad happen to K?”

“It will, if you don’t intervene.”

“What could I do to stop this?” I blinked.

“Do what you must.” Barbatos stated, his voice firm. Everything was still for a moment, and he seemed to turn his attention elsewhere, but stood still like a doe in the street, caught before the headlights of a semi truck. “We are being watched closely. We must part.”

I thanked him for his help, then ended the session. Outside, in our reality, I expected to find Mysterious nosing around the room, but I found myself alone. I was unsure who Barbatos referred to, but the feeling was more annerving with that realization.

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Paimon

I read a lot about Paimon at my old place. He seemed to be a pretty popular demon, in his various forms. This edit will be a bit longer than my original post on the subject, given I’m being a little more transparent about my journey, my goals, and the like.

The Pathworking

The ninth spirit in order is Paimon; a great king and very obedient to Lucifer. He appeareth in the forme of a man, sitting on a dromedary, with a crown most glorious on his head.

Three goeth before him a host of spirits like men with trumpets and well-sounding cymbals, and all other sorts of musical instruments… He hath a great voice, and roareth at his first coming, and his speech is such as ye magician cannot well understand, unless he compelleth him.

This spirit can teach all arts, sciences, and other secret things. He can discover what the earth is, and what holdeth it up in the waters, and what the wind is or where it is, or any other things you desire to know, he giveth dignity and confirmeth the same, he bindeth or maketh a man subject to the magician if he desireth it.

He giveth good familiars, and such as can teach all arts, he is to be observed towards the North west, he is of the order of dominions and hath two-hundred Legions of spirits under him, one part of them is of the order of angels and the other of Potestates.

If you call this spirit Paimon alone you must make him some offering to him and there will attend him two kings called Bebal & Abalam. Other spirits of the order of Potestates in his host are 25 Legions because all those spirits which are subject to him, are not always with him unless the magician compelled them. This is his Character.

– – Lesser Key of Solomon (Translated by S.L. Mathers, et. al.)

After reading that to put it in modern language for this post–our interaction makes so much more sense. I sometimes think I should’ve researched the entity before doing the pathworking, but these moments of “synchronicity” are just so satisfying.

Paimon was boisterous when he entered the room. Ranting and raving, I was slightly put off by his entrance. Through the curiously blue wood doors, the entry doors are such a strange thing, even their designs change from time-to-time.

The man standing before me is in a purple and black suit with shoulder-length hair and a long beard.

There isn’t a way for me to announce what his first line is to me without giving a whole lot of things away that I’m not comfortable with sharing right now, so I’ll say it was something similar to: “Well, if it ISN’T the [bride of mystery].”

Me:
Nervous Guilty GIF - Nervous Guilty Trident - Discover & Share GIFs
“I’m not following what at all you’re saying. My ‘translator’ for your decorated language is not working as well as I would like it to.”

Paimon continues to rave as he walks into the room, sharing details related to some sort of movement taking place on the chessboard between [Mysterious] and Lantith.

“I didn’t know that.” I sit in my chair, stiff as a board.

“I’m not sure why, it’s counterproductive for secrets in this time. [Mysterious] keeps many secrets when he needs people in his corner. Now more than ever. Especially Bael.” I say nothing, not really understanding the politics of it. “Bael speaks favorably of you, for what it’s worth. You are turning out to be quite useful.”

“Noted?” I shrug.

I realized then that I was so caught up in the theatrics that I missed speaking about why I even brought him here. He agreed to help me with my goals. As abruptly as I brought us to task, he switched us back to his rant.

“Bael comments to me that you two are interesting to observe. Your quest is a distraction that we don’t need right now.” Paimon states.

“It’s not intentional.” I scoff.

“It never is, but we need unity.” He sighs. “It will work out I suppose. Now, you have what you need, and I am sure during our journey on the path we will speak again. We should. We have much to discuss.”

I completely forgot about that last line. I guess I should reach back out at some point.

“Thanks, Paimon. Anything else before we leave each other?”

“Let the dead die, [Saga]. I will help you with this task.” He winks at me before leaving the room.

I am left there, holding the haunting memory of Mal in my proverbial hands as I am alone. A feel a tear at the edge of my eye, but wipe it away before leaving the temple.


The next day, in talking with K, who told me about an interesting dream she had about her old pastor.

" “Instead, He was speaking of those who were spiritually dead–those who were alive physically, but dead towards the God in their souls. We may be very strong and healthy physically, but still be spiritually dead–which is far more serious.” - Pastor" - K

I thought it relevant enough to append the pathworking with this note. Despite this being a quote from “the holy ghost hoes,” I thought about the spiritually dead part as meaning something larger than their interpretation and found it relevant.

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We’re now getting to a point where I moved to my own website, and most of these I haven’t shared yet due to re-writing my old content. SO glad to be getting to new content (though, Paimon could be considered as such, since I didn’t deduce it to a single quote this time).

Buer

Buer is the first spirit that appeared feminine to me.

The Tenth Spirit is Buer, a great president. He appeareth in Sagittary, and that is his shape when the Sun is there.

He teaches Philosophy (both moral and natural), the logic art, and also the virtues of all herbs and plants. He healeth all distempers in man and giveth good familiars. He governeth 50 Legions of Spirits, and his character of obedience is this, which thou must wear when thou callest him forth unto appearance.

– – Lesser Key of Solomon (Translated by S.L. Mathers, et. al.)

Pathworking

At the time of the pathworking, my newest puppy, [Nat] was barking incessantly. It was quite distracting, but nothing I did stopped it. Though, all sounds disappeared when I fell into a trance-like state at the temple.

Buer appears alien-like, which is the best way I can describe her. Petite in shape, but tall in stature, I am reminded of water in her movements. I find her appearance dainty and pretty to the eye. She wore a white, sparkling dress.

We speak briefly about a message she brings. Her greeting was a surprising hug and peck to the forehead. “The first was from [a friend of mine], and the last was from your mother.”

Before I could ask what she meant, she went on a monologue about the friend, and then described to me that she appears as “what I needed to see to be comfortable.” She agrees to help me with my goals, and ends with the following ‘wisdom’:

She laughed at the question before answering: " ‘We live by faith and not by sight.’ Trust your instinct. Believe you truth. Love what you love. Be who you want to be."

We said our goodbyes, then upon looking up Buer for my research after the pathworking–I realized I had a dream about Buer before.

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Guison

Overall, unremarkable. He corrected me on how to spell his name. Similar to my interactions with Bael, when he noticed Mysterious lingering about he made a hasty exit. He agreed to assist me with my task, noting that he knew Nautela and considered her an ally.

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Sitri

The Pathworking Experience (Feb 8, 2021)

Summary

The first time I met Sitri through my pathworking, he appeared as a tall, lanky leopard. Legs long, thin, they paired with the thin, longer than natural body of the beast he took the shape of. It was a bit of “uncanny valley” but in leopard form.

A cloud of smoke enveloped him, and he turned into a man with a rugged but handsome appearance. On the bridge of his nose, he wore small, round glasses. Hanging from his shoulders was a wool coat whose collar stretched up like a turtle neck around him. His outfit was loud in its color, reminding me of a peacock–rich in blues, greens, and purples. I noted at the time he was one of the few entities that didn’t seem formal when entering the temple. I considered him much more approachable.

We moved through the unlocking request quickly. He agreed to help me with my task.

SITRI: “You write beautifully and inspire others with your writing, but I’m afraid that will no longer be enough for the future.”

SAGA: “What do you mean?”

SITRI: “The lost one is making progress. We all will be called to assist in defeating the dragon’s beastly foe. The Goetia will be called to assist the writer.”

I didn’t know what to say to this. I stood silently in the nearly empty hall. I could sense something was wrong with my physical body, as if my face was on fire. If I didn’t know better, I’d say I’d been slapped.

Without warning, I was pulled into several visions, all focused on circles that seemed to never end.

The first and most powerful was a man (bald, extremely muscular, long beard), he was dressed in rags. He spun a ball and chain over his head, shouting at something we couldn’t see on screen. I’ve never seen this man before. He had some weird tattoos on his body, but I can’t even remember them now. The sky above was grey, and sandstone walls could be seen a few feet away.

I tried to pull myself out of the vision, briefly seeing I’m still standing with Sitri. My will was not strong enough, and I see another vision.

I saw a circle being traced over and over again in light on a dark canvas.Like this gif, but remove the trail and keep only the movement:

The circle and the background were in the colors Sitri was wearing. I heard his voice over the image, chanting: “Over and over again.”

I snapped myself free from the vision, standing in the hall. These visions were brought onto me by Sitri, as he then followed them with:

SITRI: “What comes up must come down. We must repeat the patterns over and over again until we get it right. There is no margin for error this time.”

I found myself often lost for words these days. My head inside and outside of the vision was spinning. The washing machine feeling on steroids.

SITRI: “Be afraid of the future, Nautela, for Saga will be no more when the future comes.”

The statement deeply disturbed me, and did for some time after. I can say, as of 2024, it no longer worries me. I believe we are forever being reborn anew from our experiences and pursuit of knowledge.

I realized in that moment that there was an unspoken truth between myself and Mysterious that–when said out loud–ruins the little game we played. Instead of a full circle in every stroke, as Sitri described it, our journey was like a pendulum from the travelling fair. We swung back and forth, and sometimes, with enough inertia, we could make a full loop. It’s why, since 2020, we felt like we often were going backwards in the narrative of our lives. We were in the backstroke, entering those situations we once faced with new eyes. Our old ways of dealing did not work and now we must try something new to “slay these dragons.”

2024 Saga is remaining optimistic that she’s doing a pretty OK job.

Something worth noting is that this is not the first time I’ve been in the same neighborhood as Sitri, for lack of a better metaphor.

SAGA200318B

A Ritual

I see Mysterious. He has these four elements represented by a torch or fire. He puts his hand over each and the flames turn white.

He is trying to recite a phrase of some unknown power (at least to me). Originally thinking I’m watching this in third person, I’m surprised when he grabs me from the nothing and repeats:

[word] [word] [word] Sitri.

Lirach Alora vega Sitri

I’m fairly convinced Mysterious was reciting the Enn for Sitri in this dream.

Everytime Mysterious says a word in the enn, I am jolted from my dream, only to fall asleep once more. I’m shaking my head from side-to-side, as if I am in immense pain or being struck by some invisible force.

Mysterious waited for me to slip back into the dream before continuing, then repeats the phrase again. The last time that he states this, all of the flames turn white and I am fully knocked awake. I sit straight up, but don’t dare open my eyes. I hear something walk across the ceiling in my bedroom, then down the hall. In my mind’s eye I see something like a spider and I know there is something right in front of me. I don’t open my eyes, afraid of what I might see.

I fall back into the bed, and bury my face into Charles’ back.

In hindsight then, and even now, I think about the uses for Sitri to the magician and have to give Mysterious some serious side-eye. In the event that you do not know, some uses for Sitri are:

  • To appear desirable.
  • To incite temptation.

Given what I know in 2024, I wonder if Mysterious was using Sitri’s power to hide his true appearance.

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Beleth

February 8, 2021 Pathworking

Exercise Your Rights

I performed the working for Beleth and Sitri on the same night in an attempt to catch up. I didn’t anticipate how much energy the Sitri interaction took out of me, and found myself falling asleep towards the end of the working.

The first time I saw Beleth, he appeared in red sheer with two “hats” atop his head. As I’ve mentioned in an earlier post, I don’t look up anything about the entity before I pathwork it, so then I can go back to my research and confirm that who I thought I was speaking to and who I was speaking to are the same people. I thought it was a very elaborate hat. It was ears. Beleth takes the form of a cat. I was so shook.

I did communicate with Beleth, where he agreed to help me with my task. He asked me many questions that I cannot remember and didn’t have the brain to write down–noting only how they pertained to my intentions and goals with the Goetia work and the timeline. He inevitably asked me why I thought I belonged and deserved to be on this journey, and then what I’ve done to “exercise my rights.”

My response was typical Saga, stating I have no power to exercise any sort of right. Beleth told me that was incorrect as “requests were made.” Whatever that means. As I fell asleep toward the end, slumping over into my meditation chair in the strangest way, I noted that I would pathwork Beleth the next day, ensuring I found everything I needed to from his wisdom.

February 9 2021 Pathworking (Beleth Pt. 2)

Poor Planning

The second time I pathworked Beleth, he appeared blue and sheer.

SAGA: “I wanted to bring you back here so that we could discuss the pathworking again. I’m afraid I was pretty rude last time and wanted to apologize.”

BELETH: “Why must you apologize again?”

SAGA: “I partly fell asleep while trying to perform your pathworking–I think–and that was rude of me. This is me apologizing for disrespecting your time.”

BELETH: “Your apology is accepted but unwarranted. Speak frankly. You come to me because you want to know more about my statements last time we met.”

There is a silence between us.

BELETH: “So I’ll ask again, what are you demanding out of life?”

I mentioned that I demand what I’m owed, though I don’t chase my ultimate end-goal like I should. I acknowledged that I was trying to be more comfortable with pursuing it.

BELETH: “I once wanted to be like you are–innocent, naive. I no longer wish that.”

We sat, again, in silence. He ran his fingers along the side of an armchair, uncomfortable eyes set on me.

BELETH: “Love is a terrible emotion. Once it ensnares you, it never lets you go. I’d pity you, but it would be wasted. You could not love another without his permission. I suppose it’s a good thing we are not all the same–if we allowed ourselves such delicate luxury, the world would descend into chaos.”

There was so much said that was valuable, and I tried to write it all down, but things were very much lost in translation.

Beleth stretched in the chair.

BELETH: " ‘Do not let your powers become a stumbling block for the weak.’ Who struggles? What do you gain from their struggle? This is what we must ask ourselves. Life is give and take. Where are you taking more than you give? This we must always wonder."

BELETH: “Nautela. Saga. Nautela has left you and only Saga remains. I’d say it was quite the improvement.”

Before Beleth left, I asked him if there were any closing statements he’d like to make.

BELETH: "I ask that you work on your wit. A lack of wit leads to poor planning. Poor planning leads to poor decisions. Poor decisions leads to suffering. Suffering leads to chaos.”

I felt dumb before I even said it, but honestly, I have this lingering suspicion that something bad is going to happen in this area of my life.

SAGA: “Is this related to my job?”

Beleth scowled.

BELETH: “Sometimes I wonder why you were chosen for this task. I will leave you with that, Saga.”

I said it then and I say it now–if your words were meant to deter me, Beleth, you should know I am a glutton for punishment.

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