I felt like posting this here, despite not being welcome in this place.
I made offerings once more.
I mixed the left over meat-juices and butter (from frying meat) with some (for this purpose specifically) cooked rice.
I added some raw carrots and a khaki? fruit
~after going through the motions,i saw something familiar:
each ingridiend appeared in its full form, within a feast of travelling spirits
the pork formed little piglets everywhere, the ghosts of children chasing them merily
the beef became cows that the travelling folk milked, fed and comforted
the pieces of carrot became a multitude of carrots
and the small bowl of rice became enough to feed a small village
what was new to me, were the details below:
they reminded me of pakistani or gypsie or slavic? sort of ethnic people
their hats and garments and their cloths adorned with patterns you see with native people and middle eastern carpets
their skin something between a beige-olive and light brown
i think those were turkish ? people or sometihng like it
they saw me in the door frame (There is a window/door to the balcony)
and the adults did a quick and simple bow and went back to their activities
through the open door children and piglets ran screaming and giggling
i was touched by this in a way i cant quite place
-it is a beautiful kind of pain, maybe sorrowful healing
~~the gypsie(?) sort of travelling people, reminded me to the families i saw
during the âold daysâ when i was astral projecting around the area.
There are a lot of such people, wandering still -just not with the living.
Their warmth and joy is heartbreaking, as im not sure i deserve it -but im happy and grateful for it all the same.